Wednesday, 15 August 2012

‘Suit up’- The Suit Post


The corporate ‘scene’ is not one in which I usually ‘hang’.  Yes, given, this is mostly due to the fact I seem to have a very special gift in selecting  work pursuits that fail to present me with jack-shit opportunity to make money, such as a corporate job might offer.   I suppose the extent of my encounter with the corporate-scene is having a few drinks paid for with some capitalist gains by the odd banker-type.   However, my interest  in business-men (as a specie) hasn’t ever really continued  much past the moment I finish my gratis Sauvignon Blanc (coincidently about the same time I discover that  my wine-sponsor is a bit of a prick).    What I’m getting to here, is that I have never had much of a concern for the corporate world, including what these multi-national cocks cogs are wearing.  Alas, I find most work-wear nauseating in its dullness, and the dudes that don these baggy, bland poly-blend suits seem mostly too worried about appearing as a radical or worse;  ‘trendy’ (gay) to do anything about their dire-daggy situation. 

However, I have to say; as is the case for many discerning hetero-lushes, nothing rocks my socks like a guy looking schmick in a current, co-ordinated and tailored suit. In fact the appeal of a suit-ensemble; stylishly executed, is such, that it could even compensate for your (potential) lack of beard (i.e. your social handicap) if this is the unfortunate case! Like drinking beer and wearing pants; donning a suit is one of the few things that can make you seem almost like an evolved man.  Before you think this particular path to your evolution is too much hard work and you might as well give up on being a civilized man; remove your pants and start flinging your shit about; its really not hard to look good in a suit.  In fact a fundamental rule to looking good is, don’t try and be too creative and pimp the ensemble up or you’ll just look like a girly twat.  Keep your suit (shirt, tie) simple, but well-tailored for a look that’s finer than frog hair.

Ok, I’m usually not so concerned with tailoring, because I’m not like a 70 year old dude working on Savile Row, but for this post I really need to focus on how the suit is made-up.  Honestly, if it doesn’t fit right, there’s fuck-all reason for wearing it.  I’ll have to talk about co-ordinating ties and shirts in the next post (there’s too much to say already).  This doesn’t mean that in the meanwhile you have to go all boy-band on us and brand your bare, shaven chest under your well-cut 2 piece.  Until I give you some dogmatic instruction on which shirts and ties will match with your suit, just generally stick to non-pattern shirts, except for maybe check

 Anyway, back to the way this bad-boy is put together. 
Ok, as I’m typing this, I'll be honest; I'm already getting a bit bored, because so much about choosing a suit is about that technical (tailoring) shit and for once there’s some decent TV on!  So I’m just going to get straight into laying-down some guidelines that deal with the biggest issues in selecting/wearing a suit:

Wear it 'Slim'

As with most everything in men’s clothing, your suit should be ‘slim’-tailored.  An elongated and trimmed-down silhouette is what we’re going for. If by chance you’re carrying more weight than your average male underwear model, it doesn’t matter; the same slim-cut rule applies. Wear the suit baggy, and people just assume your attempting to hide quite the awesome beer-belly anyway.  Aim for straight lines that just skim your widest parts. 

Check your pits

The armpits: the most ignored aspect of most clothing, need some attention in suits. The armholes should be high and the shoulder (seams) narrow.  This means, the armpit seam should start just under the arm i.e. not lower down on the jacket which creates a clumsy large sleeve. The shoulder seam shouldn’t extend past the shoulder (like, durr).  Despite every man’s desire to look like a pimp-daddy, the shoulder seam hitting the edge of the shoulder alone, will always make you look ‘broader’.  You don’t need to exaggerate this and look like you’ll only fit through standard door-frames, sideways. 

 Also ensure your shoulders are thinly padded.  You should show off your own physique, instead of creating some pseudo-masculine, polyester-cushioned version of one.  A suit's not meant to be a costume.  It's not dress-up day at work and you’re going as a ‘MAN’.  The suit is meant to sharpen your own blokey form. 

Finally, on the topic of the sleeve: show some!  It’s a sign of good tailoring, to be able to see a bit of cuff.  That is unless you have decided to be a fucking 'individual' again and adorn it with a novelty Spider and/or Bat-man cufflink, in which case you have just nullified any cred some good-tailoring offered you.  Help me, help you, for fark's (Aus.) sake!

Tailoring (‘Tay-law-eng’)

Go for a one or two-button closure with narrow lapels.  You don’t want to look like you’re a kinky-sicko in a grey wool-blend corset, but you do need a wee bit of closeness at the waist.  The suit needs to look like it is even just moderately involved with the contours of *your* body and not just Kmart’s size ‘M’.

Length: it matters.

To go with the elongated trimmed-down silhouette, jackets are now shorter so you don’t look like #longcolumnbodywithshortlegsfreakyman.  You should be able to easily cup your hands beneath the hem of the jacket.  If you can’t (i.e. your jacket is too long) then you probably look like a fucking hobbit.

Total pants

Your pants should also be slim (trim), with a flat front (i.e. no pleats/darts). The leg should skim the top of your shoe.  I should only see your super-quirky-(I have PERSONALITY)-socks when you sit down.

Patterns: Must you, for fuck’s sake?

Finally, before I wrap this up (because GQ can take care of the rest of the mundane tailoring info.  Their writers get paid), best to stick to non-patterned suits.  However, if you feel like people need to see your really fucking unique dynamism shining though your clothing choices i.e. you’re gagging for some pattern; avoid looking like Elton John’s even gayer second cousin [Big] Rod John and go for a very subtle plaid.  Definitely no stripes.

Ok, back to the rare quality viewing on the box.

Gucci Brea Slim-Fit Wool Suit

ASOS Skinny Fit Grey Suit Jacket in Wool Blend


www.montagio.com.au Double-breasted Plaid suit (made to order)

Ralph Lauren Black Label in an ‘Anthony’ cut


Topman Green Ultra Skinny Two Piece Suit


Paul Smith - Mainline Slim Fit 2 Button Navy Suit

Gucci Slim-Fit Wool Suit


ASOS Slim Fit Suit Jacket in Black


Paul Smith London Byard Slim-Fit Wool Suit

www.montagio.com.au Slim Navy Double pocket (made to order)

Topman Navy Ultra Skinny Two Piece Suit

Gucci Heritage Two Button Lightweight Wool Suit

ASOS Slim Fit Suit Jacket in Charcoal




36 comments:

  1. Fantastic! Apart from the shit slinging comment. I find it hard to believe the ASOS suit costs the same as a pair of shoes, what are they making them out of? http://www.asos.com/au/ASOS/ASOS-Slim-Fit-Charcoal-Suit-Jacket/Prod/pgeproduct.aspx?iid=823598&sgid=1235&r=2 I too scared to look the Armarni suit prices up, but they look brilliant. Seeing you don't get paid for your posts, you should look at setting up a charity account so that us readers can donate to make sure the posts keep coming. Either that or set up a tab at your local bar that we can put credit on for you to use. Think of the benefits if payments for your advice were tax deductible!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh Suit-Man, you're a genius! A MistressWTW bar tab! I feel a little emotional at the thought... We would be killing two birds with one stone with that plan too! Yes, of course the first bird-carnage would be 'me' as I drink myself to death...but that was going to happen anyway. The second bird is that we would all be supporting my favourite charity: The Australian Craft Beer Industry...poor bastards struggle despite the huge contribution they make to making life bearable.
      RE the shit-slinging comment: wow, I can't believe I actually (finally) managed to offend (tough gig these days). And with a purely scientific hypothesis that without suits men would revert into mere (feces-flinging) primates, at that! ;-)
      Thanks for the feedback! Laters! xMistressMenWTW.

      Delete
  2. A great suit is what every man desires. It brings the best out of man... Loved the 'ASOS Slim Fit Suit in charcoal' and "Ralph Lauren Black Label" ..
    Ralph you rock .. Love you man...!!
    Gucci slim suit in wool also looks good but not as good as wool suits of other designers. I also love slim fit suits designed byTimsy n Siddharta ..!! Anyway .. Great post sir.. Surely learned a lot about suits and the way to carry them... Also loved the concept of ‘slim’-tailored which i never cared till now..

    ReplyDelete
  3. Now this is something great and new.. I never looked after so minutes things before buying or tailoring a suit.. I keep on buying Mens formal shirts and keep on looking for apt suit or blazer for it.. But after reading this.. you completely changed my mind about selecting suits..

    ReplyDelete
  4. Glad you peeps are enjoying! Check out the latest post: 'Summer shoes (for those occasions you can't fucking get away with wearing thongs (flipflops))'(http://menwtw.blogspot.com.au/2012/10/summer-shoes-for-those-occasions-you.html)
    Cheers, Mistress WhatTo..

    ReplyDelete
  5. Great suits give every men appearance look elegant. It is very much important for them to wear comfortable suits since they meet different people dealing some business. Anyways I love the Paul Smith - Mainline Slim Fit 2 Button Navy Suit.

    best custom clothing

    ReplyDelete
  6. Party Wear Shirts for men are one of the most essential items in a man’s wardrobe. They are available in multiple designs, fits and colors that with all the choice out there, it sometimes gets a tad too difficult to choose men shirts. Having said that, the next time you are planning to buy a shirt

    ReplyDelete
  7. The simple style of the Party Wear Suits permits lots of imagination and innovation and that they some in numerous sorts. They’re created with a spread of neck patterns and cuts for the highest. a number of them have ace with splits on the perimeters whereas others have aptitude with various pleats.

    http://www.zigshaw.com/anarkali-suits.html
    http://www.zigshaw.com/bollywood-suits.html
    http://www.zigshaw.com/designer-suits.html
    http://www.zigshaw.com/party-wear-suits.html
    http://www.zigshaw.com/punjabi-suits.html
    http://www.zigshaw.com/casual-suits.html

    ReplyDelete
  8. What does it mean to get your clothes tailored?
    tailored suits

    ReplyDelete
  9. Post is very informative,It helped me with great information so I really believe you will do much better in the future.
    black military boots mens

    ReplyDelete
  10. Cool blog you got here and thank you for the valuable info.
    flower pattern mesh dress

    ReplyDelete
  11. can someone tell me how to get the little avatars to appear in my comments section? thanks!
    yoga pants for women

    ReplyDelete
  12. I definitely appreciate your blog. Excellent work!
    Cool Sweatshirts

    ReplyDelete
  13. I definitely appreciate your blog. Excellent work!
    LTF Headwear

    ReplyDelete
  14. I would be grateful if you continue with the quality of what we are doing now with your blog ... I really enjoyed it
    moose limited coupon codes

    ReplyDelete
  15. Now this is something great and new.. I never looked after so minutes things before buying or tailoring a suit.. I keep on buying Mens formal shirts and keep on looking for apt suit or blazer for it.. But after reading this.. you completely changed my mind about selecting suits..

    Branding Agency Singapore | Web Development Agency Singapore

    ReplyDelete
  16. Thanks for featuring such a great collection of bespoke suits and trousers for men. I would surely love to read more articles related to men's wedding fashion and formal wears. Do keep writing. Kudos to your work.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Thanks for taking the time to discuss that, I really feel strongly about it and love learning more on that topic. If achievable, as you gain competence, would you mind updating your blog with more information? It is highly helpful for me.
    quality bath towels

    ReplyDelete
  18. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Great work done on the article. These tips will indeed be helpful to choose the right tailored suits in mumbai. Will love to read more articles from you.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Hi,

    I’m really impressed with your blog article, such great & useful knowledge you mentioned here

    Sweatshirts for men :- Byncustoms offer customized products sweatshirts for men and cool hoodies for men and custom clothing in los angeles & new york (USA) with reasonable price.

    ReplyDelete
  21. The blog article very surprised to me! Your writing is good. In this I learned a lot! Thank you!
    Buythedozenssweaters

    ReplyDelete
  22. Thanks for the valuable information, please check the Classic Suits for latest men's suits

    ReplyDelete
  23. Getting married is a great moment & it happens once in a man's life so he should choose his dreamy dress from the best designer suits for men.

    ReplyDelete
  24. menThis one is good. keep up the good work!..

    ReplyDelete
  25. Nice and useful information about mens suit. I really liked it.
    Good work.



    Trouwpak kopen

    ReplyDelete
  26. Hey, that’s really a good post on pets for sale in Delhi, i really like your blog as the information is very useful if you are a pet lover. Well, there is one more site for the same service www.helpadya.com you should check it for more detail.

    ReplyDelete
  27. this is such an amazing blog about men suits I really liked the blog.Thanks for it.

    Bespoke suits

    ReplyDelete
  28. Really very interesting and very valuable information about the men fashion nice work.

    snap-back

    ReplyDelete
  29. Really awesome post about Men's Custom Suits, we are waiting your next post thanks.!

    ReplyDelete
  30. Love these suits!
    Take a look at an amazing catalogue of custom suits here http://www.studiosuits.com/custom_suits!

    ReplyDelete
  31. Excellent website you have here, so much cool information!..
    Look homme

    ReplyDelete